the first time.

so we met for the first time.
i was really nervous.
she acted like she did this every day.
i think she does.
i felt the need to explain everything...
found myself rambling on, with my voice cracking and my heartbeat speeding up and all of the sudden the room was stuffy and my blood ran cold and...
she wanted to get right into it.
so we did.
i kept criticizing myself the whole time,
thinking i should be better at this,
feeling embarrassed about my entire being.
but she said i was good.
better than most, she said.
apparently most people just flounder about, here and there, when they don't know what they're doing...
but i stuck with it. she thought it was impressive.
all of the sudden my hopes and dreams poured out onto her lap.
i think i almost drowned her.
she just smiled and acted reassuring,
maybe even like she cared about my life story,
and that's when i knew this was what i had been looking for.
for so long.
no more hiding.
it's time for me to sing.