ramble on.

my tea is too hot to drink.
which is ironic, because the coffee is too cold to drink.
but that's what i get for sleeping in until 1pm.
in my defense, the curtains were pulled and my room was as black as infinity.
not that i need an excuse to sleep in late.
i just need to justify it to myself.


i think today is going to be a home day.
i need to clean, for sure.
and relax. and rejuvinate.
my yoga mat is at the apartment, which is a bummer...
but i ought to stop by this weekend anyway to pick up a few things.
i'll just write it on my hand until then.
YOGA MAT. TAN BRA. TEA POT.
yep, that'll do.


i also believe it's time to start The Artist's Way.
i haven't gotten into it yet... read the first page, maybe.
i keep thinking "i'll start this on a monday" and then i forget.
i guess that's another thing to write on my hand.


the jazz festival is coming up.
i'm excited to go this year... i won't be stuck with my parents and their friends.
it's not that i don't like doing things with them...
it's more or less that we're never on the same page.
and they're more schedule oriented when it comes to festivals.
i prefer to wander around and see where my feet take me.


i've been noticing that a lot of aspects of my life are contradictory.
well, not completely.
there are aspects of my personality, i guess, that contradict other aspects of my personality.
take the jazz fest, for example.
i'm normally a very scheduled, pre-planned person.
but there are situations where i need to abandon planning and go with the flow.
i think that's the yin and yang balancing out inside of me.
so when it comes down to it, it's not that i'm contradictory or fake or what-have-you.
it's that i'm genuine, and in harmony.
and i like the sound of that much better.


another personal realization i've had was the result of a quiz in a diet book.
it took me through about 20 questions with the typical A, B, C, D responses.
now i by no means answered every question with "CAKE! ICE CREAM! SUGAR! CAKE!," etc.
but at the end of my quiz, it told me this:

You are a Sugar Fiend. You couls sacrifice every type of unhealthy food- take out, fast food, greasy meat, crbohydrates- but if you don't have something sweet to end a meal, the world might very well end.

100% accurate.
i've successfully phased out every type of poor food choice i can think of (except carbs, but i do eat whole grain and lower the GI with a little bit of fat). but the one thing i cannot do is live life without a little sugar at the end of a meal.
it could be a little chocolate mint.
it could be a fortune cookie.
it could be a bowl of fruit.
it could be a skinny latte.
it could be a chocolate cake.
who knows, who cares. but i can't walk away from the table with out something sweet on my palate.

of course, i never realized this until i took this quiz on tuesday.
go figure.


anyway, i think that's enough rambling for today.
hopefully it wasn't too terribly boring.
if you've read this far, i commend your efforts.
TTFN.